Monday, 30 April 2007

The worst days of my life.

There are times that come and goes against all your expectations, destroying all your beliefs, thwarting all your hopes. You feel like the life has come to an end.But its only a pitstop where there are people who supports you who backs you. You see a light, you know the darkness is semi-permanent. You re-enter your life rejuvaenated and revitalized. Nobody could beat you but you. You feel life, you are racing away from all your enemies in your car. You are breaking the speed of sound. You are ahead. You could feel your stomach sink. You see trees blur. The roads pass by. The farmlands seem to be a streaks of green. The rear view mirror loses all its meaning. You will smile when you go back to the past. You feel the way you were and the way you are. Those are past. Future beckons you.
Office. Friday and saturday, I worked like a donkey. I even felt like a donkey. I work for some ill eduacated yellow men. 24 hours of working without rest. I pushed myself to the limit and the death smiled. They want us to be their way. They exploit our brain just because they don't have any. They do no good for us. But we need money. They do good for their country.But we need money. They are exploiting our economy. But still we are greedy for more money. We have lost our lives. But still money makes us happy.
This busy schedule made me down, made me short tempered which resulted in I losing her. There is no coming back. There is only end. I wish I had undo in my life. But changes are inevitable. I have to move on like everyone. I have miles to go before I sleep and miles to go before I sleep."Whatever happened, it happened for good.
What is happening, is also happening for good.
Whatever will happen, that too will be for good.
What have you lost for which you weep?
What did you bring with you, which you have lost?
What did you produce, which has perished?
You did not bring anything when you were born.
Whatever you have, you have received from Him.
Whatever you will give, you will give to Him.
You came empty handed and you will go the same way.
Whatever is yours today, it was somebody else's yesterday
And it will be somebody else's tomorrow.
The change is the law of universe."
Bhagavad Gita
This is what you call life. Its a road called endless joy but with some pitfalls you should be careful with.

Friday, 27 April 2007

Truth, Lies and a stolen post

As the title says the post is lifted from Jos aka Appu who lifted it from someone else. So I believe the this theft has started some time long back, I don't want to get into too much details. I fell it will be nice if everyone does something like this in his/her blog.Everyone can know more about him/her. Many things will be more or less the same for every person.

Three things I am passionate about
1. My Family
2. Arsenal
3. Keralam, Daivathinte swantham naadu(God's own country).

Three things that scare me
1. Doing somethin I don't like
2. When I speed my motor cycle beyond 80(in fact I keep on looking my speedo after it cross 80)
3. Working on weekends.

Three people who make me laugh
1. Manjeri(A friend of mine)
2. Tom(&Jerry).
3. Calvin and of course Hobbes too.

Three things I love
1. Yet again God's own country
2. Arsenal
3. My mom's cooking.

Three things I hate
1. Showing off
2. Double crossing.
3. Bad music.

Three things I don't understand
1. Why she left me?
2. Why I still love her?
3. What I am here for?

Three things I am doing right now
1. The obvious.
2. Reading some UK based dailies
3. thinking of what to do for the technical audit

Three things I want to achieve/own b4 I die
1. A world cup football medal(somehow)
2. A yacht
3. My life

Three things you should listen to
1. Martin Luther King's I have a dream speech.
2. Jim Morrison.
3. A great sports commentator.

Three things you should never listen to
1. Jim Morrison's Bird of Prey when you are high.
2. your in-laws(Jos I agree with you)
3. Gossips.

Three things you should feel
1. Solitude.
2. Wayanad hairpin on a cold winter night with friends
3. the joy in the eyes of Marcus Tardelli when he scored the winning goal for Italy in 82 world cup final.

Three places you should go
1. Kudremukh.(you definitely should go, its one great place)
2. Mumbai.
3. Alleppey, the Venice of the East.

Three places I want to go
1. London
2. tropical forests of Africa and South America.
3. To some unknown places like Che Guevara did.

Three things I'd like to learn
1. French(I have learnt a little bit).
2. To interpret female minds.
3. Bridge(I tried but failed)

Three favourite books
1. O'Jerusalem(read long time back)
2. Mayyazhipuzhayde Theerangalil(one of the first books I have ever read).
3. Anne Frank's Diary.

Three favourite food
1. Kanji and Chammanthi.
2. Kappa and a special chutney made using green chilly and onion
3. Puttu and Kadala.

Three beverages I drink regularly
1. DSP Black.
2. Mansion House
3. Tea.

Wednesday, 25 April 2007

Lord of the Materials:The End of the King(not the SATAN)

It is not easy to be a human being. We are constantly hassled by our life. It is all about survival. It is all about how huge your bank balance can get. It is not how beautiful your life can get. I still dream of a day when there are no worries, a cool breeze caressing my hair like a true love, with lush green trees giving me the shade that only a mother can provide. I always see a light at the end of the tunnel, but always it had been the light of an incoming train that will run me over. This is life. There is no place for love, care and innocence. The priority is always money, money and more selfishness.
Back to college days...
We were an army of 7 point someones under the aegis of god almighty(MAMAN), Anilu and Ragav are the exceptions, they were 8 point someones, luckily we were not 5 point someones. I thought whatever I do, even if I tell the invigilator that I am going to indulge in some sort of malpractices the almighty would have made him deaf by the time I start speaking. We were brimming with confidence. We were addicted to it in such a way that even if the question was 1+1, we either had to consult with the neighbouring guy or refer to the materials that we have.
One day, I'll never forget that day. It was the last sessional examination of our B.Tech examination. BMI, Bio-medical Instrumentation. The professor who taught that subject was an eccentric man, he even made fun out of a junior girl who tried to suicide. Back to exam, the invigilator was none other than my project guide who is the most cunning and crooked fellow in the institution. The question was something regarding lung capacity, or a heart beat.. I don't exactly remember. But anyway the invigilator saw me putting back the chit I had brought specially for that question elegantly into my packet. THE END. He tore away my answer sheet. I felt my world tumbling down. I felt it was the end of the universe. I smelled death. If the thing goes to higher authority the result is debarring from the college for 3 years, the last thing I wanted. I pleaded before him.
Sir:Tell the truth, you resorted to this activity for all the exams,right?
Me:No,No..This is the first time in my life I have done this. If I were experienced will you able to catch me?It was because of my inexperience you were able to catch me cheating, Sorry sir. I will not repeat it.
He was kind enough to forgive me and I even got A grade for my project also. Thank You a lot. It was the end of all sort of malpractices. I wrote the first exam of my college life and the last exam without resorting to any sort of malpractices. I still smile whenever I think of that occasion.

Tuesday, 17 April 2007

The art of being wise, doing wiser things and not hurting a Chelsea fan

I posted something yesterday that I expected to be more or less a neutral posting, but it didn't turn out the way I expected. The comments will prove it. I am biased, Bulshee is biased, Ragav is biased, Sankaran is biased , even US.KONDU(name changed to keep anonymity) who doesn't care anything in this world beyond the tax and duties implemeted on liquor and cigarattes is biased more or less on his way. I being a die-hard Arsenal fan(self proclaimed) can never maintain more neutrality when I write or talk about Chelsea. There are many facts that everyone knows. I don't want to drive myself into yet another controversy that result in a debate between me and three men army of my roomies, which I may(intentionally made bold) end up losing.
It was Sankaran who advised me not to post anything that may hurt or aggrieve somebody's beliefs. Sankaran really had a terrible experience for posting something that really caused an upset on Bulshee's feeling. It was one great day in Sankaran's life. There are many more in the list.
What I want to tell is neither about Sankaran's beliefs nor the feud between an Arsenal fan and Chelsea fans, but about the right to expression. I can write anything I want. I may agitate a few, but I can't or I never will agitate millions like L.K.Advani.
Here is something that happened to a girl(in fact Rashmi Bansal) for writing something against an institution which is declared fraud by some magazines .Some comments in that blog are totally unacceptable. Criticisms are good, it will improve a person's outlook regarding that subject. It doesn't mean they are against you, it means they are against your views.
No matter what, you may feel some satisfaction if you do something out from your mind which is against someone's beliefs. I love those debates in which I try my best to classify Arsenal are the best and my friends try to do the same to Chelsea. I have got some points to make and so do they. If you believe in something, believe only if you have a reason. Don't take anything for granted. You should be able to prove your point before everyone who questions you. But always make a point, never write anything about a person if you feel it may hurt him bad. It may make things worse.
It all started when I described Mourinho as a "young punk" and an anonymous commented on calling Mourinho a young punk and aggravating my feelings of being a gunner and the frustration of not winning a trophy for the last two years. But I still describe Mourinho as a young punk. :-)

Monday, 16 April 2007

Will it be blues for the reds or is it the blue who will shed the blood?

Look forward for the 15 days from May 9-23 as English football's greatest two club trilogy. There will be no blood spilt, no lives endangered, as in the fights for the Middle Earth, but Manchester United and Chelsea are squaring up themsleves for a heavy weight clash.
Starting from the Premiership to FA Cup till Champions League, it could all be the fight of two English giants for the glory. Milan and Liverpool will have to step aside in the European Cup as watford and Blackburn did to them in FA Cup. While the reds cruised past Roma and Watford the Blues almost faltered before Valencia and Blackburn. What a treat for eyes will it be when these two giants fight for the glory.
The football's most beautiful league has just turned out to be a battle of four, where the most of the rest 16 struggle to keep themselves in the top flight. In fact the EPL has turned out to be a cold war between Russian oligarch and american tycoons. It will be a fight between a club that has created legends and a club that has an unending transfer funds.
But who can resist the three-part epic of the young punk Jose Mourinho taking on the old king in Sir Alex Ferguson, as two sharply contrasting personas turn May into a struggle for supremacy?
The fact Abramovich wants a little more entertainment for his £500million admission fee to the game, but a part of him ,as his emotions had hsown us after their win over Rovers,is probably also addicted to the melodrama of late winners that has kept Chelsea in the hunt for glory.
But we will have to wait to see for whom the glory awaits.

Saturday, 14 April 2007

Lord of the Materials:The Two Years

Yesterday was the annual day in our company. I thought it will unwind myself from the daily mundane. But before our team left for the function we had a short meeting regarding some blah..blah.. which if i tell that I was interested in it will be the joke of the century. While I was travelling in the hyperspace as spaceman spiff( If you don't know who spiff is.) during the meeting, Manager said,"Hey guys*,you need to come tomorrow. " I wondered what the hell he was talking about, has he gone mad or is it that he wants to show the power on his fellow subordinates as if they are his slaves. It destroys the entire mood of Friday. Whatever there is nothing as bad as spending a Saturday afternoon in the office and slogging.
I will come back to the topic. We were the masters in cheating and malpractices for the next two years. I will be understating the contribution of Mr.Kuresh Sumar S.K(name changed) towards our achievement if I don't mention his name in this. We have never found any teacher as inspiring as him. He was a man of mettle. We were lucky to have him for 2 consecutive years, I even had the courage to take an elective offered by him(I was 3rd from the top in the class of 17 in the elective he offered before the final exam, after the final exam I was 3rd fro the bottom). For us attending his lectures or learning his concept is similar to the interest of George Bush's towards World Peace. All the doors to pass the examination was shut except the "golden path", which never deserted us. We relentlessly resorted to it everywhere we could. May it be a lab exam or even if its just a class tutorial we were addicted to cheating. The first thing we used to do for an exam was preparing the materials. We feared none. We were self proclaimed masters. We were second to none in cheating.
We had economics in 7th semester, for which we took the entire 4 modules in 4 bit of paper. The funniest part is that we wrote the answers module-wise. If the first bit we got was for 4th module, all the questions relevant to the module will be answered in a single shot. Like wise 1,23. Teachers would have amazed of our skills of writing according to the modules. We were proud of it, in fact wickedly proud of it.
"Great ability develops and reveals itself increasingly with every new assignment."

*Our team is like our college, its 90% the guys the rest 10% are so beautiful that god will pardon us for calling them guys.
Disclaimer:All the things mentioned here are some wild fantasies from an idle mind. If any of the incidents has happened in real, please don't blame the me and the author(that is me), will not be responsible for any of the outcomes.

Monday, 9 April 2007

Great Weekend(continued)

As soon as she saw me, don't know whether she had a presumption, she jumped out of her seat and went straight to conductor and asked whether any other seat is available. She must be a moron, which girl will ever thrash the chance of spending a night(in bus)with a handsome, young and a single gentle man. Luckily she didn't get a seat and had to satisfy herself with what god has given her. I gave her a devilish smile as if the lion has got his prey. The cool dude as if to impress "my" girl opened his newly bought laptop and tried doing something, he clicked here and there and pressed some keys and tried to play a CD. The result:Windows Vista is no better. I and "my girl" couldn't stop laughing at his plight, the entire guys in my row started laughing. The other persons in my row were some trekking dudes. After the bus started they started drinking cokes mixed with you know what and they even offered me a drink.
Lesson 1:Don't accept eatables from strangers.
Lesson 2:Eatables also include drinkable.
They thought that I will politely decline their request because of the two rules. But I desperately wanted to have a drink because the seat I was sitting was not a comfortable one, and also I wanted to sleep well. I took a gulp a large gulp from their bottle and smiled at them innocently. I was happy that I got what I wanted. After that they didn't offer me anything, Lays, Fags etc. They just didn't want to run out of stocks of their materials. I slept beautifully with cool wind on my face and a monkey cap around my head. I woke up only to the conductor's shrill noise that banged my ears informing me of reaching the destination.
The next three days were great. Away from all the busy schedules, all the deadlines, I enjoyed the freedom my life. Its great to be in a solitary peace.

Great Weekend

Last weekend I went to a calm and quiet place called Kuduremukh. Its a great place to spent a weekend after a hectic week of work.
It happened to be the first time I went to Majestic alone in a city bus. Its a bit scary after many of my friends losing cell phones and wallets amidst the crowd. The last thing I wanted is to lose my cell phone. Guinness Book of world records is monitoring my movements carefully that if they find me lose my cellphone again my name will be embossed in golden letters in that book. Anyway I reached the bus station safely and I started searching for the platform 23.
After an hour of searching platform 23 I felt I am not gonna catch my bus in this life or the next
Since I am ignorant of the language Kannada and most of the conductors didn't seem to like communicate in English, I resorted to our "Mathrubhasha" Hindi.
Me:Platform 23,kahaa??(+actions)
Conductor 1:Pointing to east.Vahaam
Conductor 2:(saying to other guy in Kannada)then pointing to south,platform 23 udhar hain??
Me:(confused)Kahaan...bah..jabaah..mein wahaam kaise ja...saktha??
You can't blame them if they believed that I was a jump out from a mental asylum. I cannot express what happened there in words. It all happened through actions and some noise which doesn't have any scripts. They were kind enough to accompany me to the platform. The second problem:All the buses are having their board in Kannada, I studied carefully the Kannada version of kudremukh and I got into a bus which had a board similar to that figure. Man, I learnt Kannada, I got into the right bus. To my left was a cute looking girl, to my right was a "COOL DUDE".
*********continued(there is an upload limit in my office )************

Wednesday, 4 April 2007

Lord of the Materials:The fellowship of the Materials

I remember those days when I and maman had "Combined Study". We were studying so hard that one day we decided to write down the things that we usually do while having combined study based on the frequency. The list was as follows.
1. Calling each other un-parliamentary words.
3.Watching movies
5.Disturbing ajmal.
6.Contemplating the future of RADICALS.
7.Preparing the "study materials for the exam".
We were so hardworking that we often require others help to crack even a single question of the exam. So we resorted to illegal methods to find a way to get our B.Tech degree. Almost our entire gang* was into this malpractices whose inspiration was none other than Maman, his name will go down in to record books for that, Maman really was a god of malpractices, the way he does it is an art. He looks like an innocent boy, sits like an innocent boy and does everything like a satanic boy.
I and maman studied EMMI(if you want to find about it got got EEE website and check whether its there) for 7 long hours from 10.30 to 3.30 and still we were not confident what to write for the exam tomorrow. We ended up writing materials for the exam next day and it took only an hour to complete that.
Maman:"*SIGH* We wasted a lot of our time."
Maman: We wasted a lot of time studying. If he had those tie also we could have had a lot of materials for the exam.
Everyone of our gang took materials to the exam and came out with flying colours, none of us scored less than 16 out of 20 marks.'
There started an un-ending saga of hard work, endurance and the courage of some young men for the next three years.

*by the way my class was polarized into two, a group of studious kinda boys who were the apple of all the girl's eyes and the group of young men who never disturbed the class and some times so humble that we never dared to look into teacher's eyes, instead we showed them the back of our head, that's not sleeping, we were polite..thats all
PS:All materials, study materials and all other illegal activities refers to the products of Chits4Exam Inc

Tuesday, 3 April 2007

Non duality, self realization and a bottle of whisky

"What is called 'mind' is a wondrous power residing in the Self. It causes all thoughts to arise. Apart from thoughts, there is no such thing as mind. Therefore, thought is the nature of mind. Apart from thoughts, there is no independent entity called the world. In deep sleep there are no thoughts, and there is no world. In the states of waking and dream, there are thoughts, and there is a world also."Inspired by Ramana Maharshi
Its all about life, all about being conscious of our mere existence. Nothing can exist on its own. Everything is dependent on others. There are no opposites in this universe only relations. Light exists only because there is darkness. The sole reason that the god exists is the existence of the evil. It is a single entity. It is the non duality.
Now, I come back to my self. These sort of spiritual words of wisdom will definitely make one void of emotions for his life. The world itself be in a state of non existence. Imagine what if everyone comes out of their mundane activities and realize their self. There will be peace there will be eternal bliss. We are just lost souls in this rapid swiftness of this life. Nobody realizes who they are, what they are. Nobody dares to ask himself "Who Am I?" The life is wasted.
At the end of the day the soul succumbs to the routine affairs from which nodody is able to come out. The truth is nobody wants to come out of the ordinary course that may create a spark of rebellion whcih may change the world. Nobody wants to bear that torch. Nobody wants to be revolutionary. Everyone wants to be an ordinary man. Everyone wants just to be a lesser mortal in this life or the next.
Life is just a bottle of whisky which may take us to a state of bliss, but momentarily..only momentarily.....
" It means that light and shade, long and short, black and white, can only be experienced in relation to each other; light is not independent of shade, nor black of white. There are no opposites, only relationships."Lankavatara Sutra